Dutch Wedding Toasts: Cheers, Speeches, and Customs

Who speaks, and when

• The ceremoniemeester, a friend or relative who runs the day, introduces each contribution.
• Parents give a toast. Friends and siblings perform: a rewritten song, a quiz, a video, a staged interview with the couple.
• The couple thanks the room, usually at the cake or before the party guests arrive.

How long

Toasts are short. The performances can be long, and there may be many. The ceremoniemeester keeps a schedule and will tell you your slot.

What you’ll see

• Dutch weddings often come in layers: a small ceremony and lunch for close family, a dinner for a larger circle, and an evening party for everyone else. The invitation says which you are in.
• 'Op het bruidspaar!' is the toast, with 'Proost!' as the answer.
• The bruidssuiker, sugared almonds or small sweets, are handed to guests as a favor.
• A wish tree or a guest book of advice is common, and someone may read the best entries aloud.
• Speeches from friends are often group efforts with a lot of inside jokes, which is accepted here in a way it is not elsewhere.

If you’re the guest from somewhere else

• Ask the ceremoniemeester before planning anything. They run the day and they will fit you in.
• Check which part of the day you are invited to. Arriving for dinner when you were invited to the party is a real mistake.
• A plain, short toast from a foreign guest is a welcome contrast to the sketches.

A toast you could give

Short, warm, specific to the couple, and ending on the phrase. Swap in your own names and your own detail; the shape is what matters.

I was warned that Dutch weddings run on a schedule, so I will keep to mine. Sanne, you are the most honest person I know. Daan, she will always tell you the truth, and you will always be glad. Op het bruidspaar!