German Wedding Toasts: Cheers, Speeches, and Customs

Who speaks, and when

• The parents of the bride or groom usually open with a toast and a welcome.
• The Trauzeugen, the witnesses, often speak, and friends run games, quizzes, and skits between courses.
• The couple thanks everyone, and the groom's speech is common in many families.

How long

A parent's toast runs two to four minutes. Friends' contributions are more often games than speeches, and an evening with eight short items is normal.

What you’ll see

• 'Hoch sollen sie leben' is sung by the room, three times, with glasses raised on each 'hoch.'
• The Hochzeitszeitung, a wedding newspaper of photos, stories, and jokes about the couple, is written by friends and handed out to guests.
• Guests bring old plates to smash the night before, at the Polterabend, and the couple sweeps up together. Shards bring luck; glass is never broken, only ceramic.
• A log may be sawn in half by the couple with a two-handled saw, in front of everyone, as their first job done together.
• The bride may be 'stolen' by friends and the groom must find her, usually at a nearby bar, and pay the tab.

If you’re the guest from somewhere else

• If you can, bring something for the Hochzeitszeitung: a photo, a memory, a line.
• Join the singing even if you do not know the words. 'Hoch' three times is most of it.
• A short toast from a visiting friend fits well after the parents. Two minutes, warm, with a glass at the end.

A toast you could give

Short, warm, specific to the couple, and ending on the phrase. Swap in your own names and your own detail; the shape is what matters.

Lena once drove four hours to bring me a key I had left in her car, and never mentioned it again. Jonas, she will do that for you every day. To Lena and Jonas. Prost, und hoch sollen sie leben!