Danish Wedding Toasts: Cheers, Speeches, and Customs

Who speaks, and when

• A toastmaster, often a friend of the couple, runs the dinner. Every speaker signs up with them in advance, and the toastmaster decides the order.
• Tradition sets the first speeches: the bride's father welcomes, then the groom speaks, then the best man, with the bride and others after.
• Many guests speak. A dinner with ten speeches, songs, and toasts is normal, and the meal is paced around them.

How long

Three to five minutes each, but the toastmaster will tell you. With so many speakers, short is a kindness, and songs written for the couple are often preferred to speeches.

What you’ll see

• Guests tap their glasses with cutlery and the couple must stand and kiss. Stamp your feet and they must kiss under the table.
• If the groom leaves the room, the men rush to kiss the bride. If the bride leaves, the women kiss the groom.
• Late in the night the groom's friends cut off the toes of his socks, so that his new wife can show her sewing skills.
• A long, loud 'hurra' with raised glasses ends many of the speeches, led by the toastmaster.
• The 'brudevals,' the wedding waltz, must be danced before midnight, and guests close in around the couple as they dance.

If you’re the guest from somewhere else

• If you want to speak, tell the toastmaster well before the day. Do not stand up unannounced.
• Learn 'skål' and the glass-tapping rule. You will want to use both.
• Expect the dinner to last four or five hours. The speeches are the entertainment.

A toast you could give

Short, warm, specific to the couple, and ending on the phrase. Swap in your own names and your own detail; the shape is what matters.

I have been told the toastmaster gave me three minutes, which is two more than Mads ever gave me on the phone. Freja, he listens to you. We have all noticed. To Freja and Mads. Skål, og hurra for brudeparret!