Indian Wedding Toasts: Cheers, Speeches, and Customs

Who speaks, and when

• Speeches, where there are speeches, usually come at the sangeet or the reception, not the ceremony. Siblings, cousins, and friends perform choreographed dances, and a sibling may give a short speech between them.
• Elders bless the couple. At many receptions, a parent or an uncle speaks briefly, and the couple thanks the guests.
• Traditions vary enormously by region, religion, and family, and an Indian wedding can follow Hindu, Sikh, Muslim, Christian, or Jain rites, each with its own shape.

How long

Short, if at all, at the ceremony. Two to three minutes at a reception. The performances at the sangeet are the real program, and they are rehearsed for weeks.

What you’ll see

• The baraat: the groom arrives in a procession, often on a horse, with drums and dancing relatives, and is greeted by the bride's family.
• The sangeet: an evening of music and choreographed dances by both families, the night or two before.
• Mehndi: the bride's hands and feet are decorated with henna, and the groom's name is hidden in the design.
• At many Hindu weddings the couple circles a fire, the saat phere, taking seven vows, and the bride's sisters may steal the groom's shoes and ransom them back.
• Food is a central and very serious part of every event, and there are many events.

If you’re the guest from somewhere else

• Ask which events you are invited to and what to wear to each. Dress codes differ by event and are meant.
• 'Badhai ho' and 'mubarak ho' are the congratulations. Namaste to elders.
• If you are asked to be in a sangeet dance, rehearse. People will have.

A toast you could give

Short, warm, specific to the couple, and ending on the phrase. Swap in your own names and your own detail; the shape is what matters.

Priya planned this wedding the way she plans everything, which is completely, and then made it look like it happened on its own. Arjun, you are marrying the most capable person in this room, and that is a big room. Badhai ho. To both of you!