Unity Sand Ceremony Script With Both Families Pouring

Sana walks in with her parents on either side of her. Then Leni walks in with her mother and her grandmother, who holds Leni's arm the whole way.

On a small table at the front there's a clear glass jar, empty, and four small bottles of colored sand.

The music stops.

Please be seated.

Hello, everyone. My name is Pearl. Leni and I grew up two houses apart, and we've been friends since we were seven and she talked me into digging up my mother's tulip bulbs to look for treasure. We didn't find any. We got grounded together, which at seven is basically a lifelong bond.

Thank you all for being here. Sana and Leni asked me to tell you that every person in this courtyard was chosen. Nobody's here to fill a table. If you got an invitation, it's because one of them said your name out loud and the other one said yes, of course.

Five years ago, Leni bought a camper van off a man in a gas station parking lot for nine hundred dollars. It was a 1978. It was the color of old mustard. It did not run.

She'd met Sana exactly twice at that point, at a friend's birthday and then at a pottery sale. On the third time, Leni mentioned the van, and Sana said, very calmly, that she'd always wanted to learn how to rebuild an engine. Leni found out later that this was not true. Sana had never once wanted to rebuild an engine. She wanted a reason to keep showing up.

So she kept showing up. Every Saturday for two summers, in Leni's mother's driveway, with a library book about carburetors and a bag of plums. They named the van the Dijon, because of the color. They pulled out the rotten floor. They found a fork, three pennies from 1981, and a love letter from someone named only "R" under the passenger seat. They kept the letter.

Leni's grandmother brought them lemonade almost every Saturday. She told me that by the middle of the first summer she'd stopped asking whether they were dating, because the answer was so obviously yes, and because they kept handing each other tools without looking.

The Dijon started for the first time on a Tuesday in August. Sana cried. Leni pretended she didn't. They drove it eleven miles to a lake and back, and it broke down twice. They've taken it as far as the coast since then. It still breaks down. They still take it.

What I've seen in the two of them is a lot of patience with things that are slow and broken and worth it. Sana is the steady one. When something goes wrong, she gets very quiet and goes looking for the manual. Leni is the one who gets everyone else to come help. Between the two of them, the job gets done, and usually someone's laughing by the end.

When a pipe burst in Sana's apartment two winters ago, Leni parked the Dijon at the curb out front and ran an extension cord to it for a space heater, so Sana would have somewhere dry to be. Sana told me she ate dinner in that van for nine nights in a row, and it was the first time she understood that Leni was going to be there for the hard stuff too.

Sana and Leni have asked for a sand ceremony today. It's simple. Each family pours its own sand into this jar, and then the two of them pour together. Once the sand is mixed, you can't really separate it again, and that's the whole idea.

They wanted their families to pour first, because neither of them got here on her own. Sana's parents and her brother, Gil, will you come up.

Sana's parents and Gil come up and pour the white sand together into the jar.

Thank you. Leni's mother and grandmother, will you come up.

Leni's mother and grandmother pour the blue sand together. Her grandmother pours slowly and makes sure she gets the last grain out of the bottle.

Now Sana and Leni.

Sana pours the gold sand and Leni pours the green sand at the same time. The colors land in uneven stripes and start to mix at the edges.

Take a look at that. It isn't neat, and it isn't supposed to be. Some of it is from your families, some of it is from you, and from here on it's all in the same jar.

Pearl puts the lid on the jar and sets it back on the table.

That jar is going to live on a shelf in the Dijon. They've already measured the spot.

Sana and Leni have written their own vows. Leni, you're first.

Leni reads her vows. Then Sana reads hers.

Gil hands Pearl the rings.

Leni, place this ring on Sana's finger and repeat after me.

Leni: Sana, I give you this ring. I'll keep showing up, on the good days and on the days we break down by the side of the road.

Sana, place this ring on Leni's finger and repeat after me.

Sana: Leni, I give you this ring. I'll keep showing up, on the good days and on the days we break down by the side of the road.

Leni, do you take Sana to be your wife, to be patient with her, to tell her the truth, and to stand beside her for the rest of your life?

Leni: I do.

Sana, do you take Leni to be your wife, to be patient with her, to tell her the truth, and to stand beside her for the rest of your life?

Sana: I do.

Sana and Leni, your families have poured their sand, and you've made your promises in front of all of us. By the power vested in me by [the State of ___], I pronounce you married.

You may kiss your wife.

They kiss. Leni's grandmother is the first one clapping.

Everyone, please stand and welcome, for the first time, the married Sana and Leni.

The recessional music starts. Sana carries the sand jar back down the aisle with both hands.

Pearl, Sana, Leni, and two witnesses sign the license at the sand table. Gil is one of the witnesses.